Many people tell me they feel frustrated about their role. Common feelings people experience are:
- Antagonistic
- Frustrated
- Disillusioned
- Blocked
- Misunderstood
- Unsupported
When we struggle to get buy in for our ideas, we can become so frustrated that we display behaviours which mean we are seen as an adversary by colleagues. We may be accused of being negative, of not listening even of being a Dictator.
Most of us go to work to do a good job. We enroll for professional development and training and some of us consider ourselves to be an expert in our field. We have experience that shows we can achieve great things and we want to share our knowledge.
When we find ourselves in the adversarial role we stop being productive. People stop listening and we will cease to get buy in. Robert B Cialdini in his book The Psychology of Persuasion provides us with methods to get people to comply. I find most of us can recognise when we are being manipulated. I have managed to train my Labrador to comply with my wishes with liver treat manipulation, unfortunately I have found the same trick does not work on my colleagues.
If we want to be the Ambassador at work (“A representative or promoter of a specified activity”), capable of getting things done, getting people to say yes and then do the work, then we need to change the way we work.
Rather than focusing on how you can get people to change here are the top five things you can do to become an Ambassador.
Get to know the people you work with
Not just their name, but what is important to them at work, how do they like to operate and communicate, what are their values.
Be helpful
Generosity breeds generosity. Be careful you are not being manipulative (The Psychology of Persuasion), but rather genuinely share your expertise and help solve other people’s problems.
Develop a team spirit
Working alone might mean you get things done more quickly but if people haven’t been involved they won’t buy in.
Be enthusiastic
If people hear you complaining about how hard and boring your work in they are not going to want to be involved.
Be consciously competent
Qualifications are not enough. You need to know your stuff, be willing to share and acknowledge where you need help.